Yesterday was E's first day of first grade, Mr N did not want to drop her off, so I took her by myself. Daddy said his goodbyes at the front door and away we went. On the very short drive to the school she asked me to stay a while until she wasn't scared. As soon as she walked into class she saw a classmate from Kindergarten, which immediately put her at ease. She settled into her desk with her first project for the day, after putting her backpack & hoodie away.
Upon returning home I began to get ready for field service, Mr N assured me he did not want to go with me. So I set out on my own, leaving him to play alone for the morning. When I got home he played outside for a while, digging happily in the mud by the pear tree. He is quite content to play alone, but seeing him without his sissy made me feel for him. They typically play together at any activity they choose. We went to a quick playdate with friends before picking E up from school. I planned to drop Mr N off at home while I picked up E from school, but he insisted on accompanying me. We convinced Daddy to take a 10 minute break from work to join us in retrieving E from her first day at school.
Once we were out of the building Mr N begged to play on the playground, so Daddy took the car and went home to work while I stayed with the kids so they could play for a while. E played with a new classmate of hers, while I visited with the little girl's mother. Storm clouds moving in motivated us to start walking home for snack time. Of course, E was starving as she was last year when returning home from school each day.
The kids played together the rest of the evening, interrupted only by dinner and baths before bed. E's only disappointment in first grade so far is that they haven't seen the inside of a cat. We haven't broken it to her yet that dissecting is typically a high school science project.
This morning E was much more confident about going to school. Mr N did some more digging in the mud and unearthed two rocks that are now decorating the coffee table, leaving behind scratches and dirt. He helped attach the carpet to the new front step we built, as the old one was fatally injured by the removal of the piano last week. Mr N also helped me make Daddy lunch, constantly stirring the top one inch of pot of pasta as it was cooking.
Preschool for Mr N starts September 8, I think by then he'll be happy to have his steady routine returned, since sissy isn't home to play with every day. He told me repeatedly to "stop singing" as he does not appreciate my vocal talent, it apparently is as amazing as my ability to dance. He frequently tells me not to dance, whether it be at home, in the car, or in public. I never thought my 4 year old would be embarrassed so easily by his dorky mom, by the time he's a teen hopefully he's over it, I don't foresee me being less embarrassing at any point in the future.
Wednesday, August 27, 2014
Sunday, August 24, 2014
Happiness
Happiness is cuddling in bed with my husband and children, never wanting to let go. Mr N crawled into bed with us at some point during the night, when he awoke this morning he was full of cuddles, sweetness and stories to share. As he lay in my arms he spoke so clearly and said so much, I wish I would have recorded it for all to hear. I came to realize just how much Mr N is talking, just how clear his words have become, and how, despite his delays, his progress is astounding and so incredibly impressive.
Meeting did not go well this morning, as we arrived to find a full house and no empty seats in the main hall. Mr N still does not do well in the back room, so daddy spent the first half of the meeting in the car with him, then we traded places. Sometimes we tend to forget that Mr N still has limitations since we see how tremendously he has progressed in so many areas. Noises, primarily echoing, still are overwhelming to him and must be avoided if at all possible. Large crowds, especially indoors, are still a source of noises, smells, and sights that send him into sensory overload.
I can't help but be incredibly proud of how far my little man has come, he's excited to be starting school in a couple of weeks, he has a best friend (more about that in a minute), he's self sufficient and independent, at times more so than his sister. Mr N has taken a liking to toast, which he makes and gets for himself without any help; he's getting to where he can put his shoes on all by himself, he's wiping his own butt with prompting, washes his hands, gets dressed and undressed (still needs help with buttons), can buckle and unbuckle the chest clip on his carseat, and I could go on about all of his accomplishments.
So back to his best friend, I had an epic emotional breakdown a few weeks ago (see previous post) after a rough day. Mr N gets along great with most other children, playing and sharing without any prompting, but there are the seldom few who bully him and are just downright mean, which breaks my heart into a million pieces. Not because Mr N gets upset or even realizes it, he freely forgives even the worst injuries, but because bullies exist and they somehow single Mr N out as different then pick on him. I was watching my friend's kids a few days after the meltdown and they were all happily playing throughout the house when I hear the 5 year old say "Mr N is my best friend". I could have kissed that dear child! He doesn't see a child with Autism, he doesn't see a child who has speech delays, he doesn't see anything but his best friend, his friend who likes to play with the same toys and the same games as him, he sees his friend. Not surprisingly, his mom is a dear, sweet friend of mine who has taken the time to teach her children to be kind to others, to treat others as they want to be treated. They didn't come by their manners and good behavior by happenstance, they were taught by their parents; and for this I am forever grateful.
Our friends came over this afternoon for a little play time, when they arrived I was inside doing a quick sweeping in the kitchen and living room (yeah I'm one of those who only cleans 5 minutes before company arrives, sorry friend) as the children piled out of the car and friends ran to greet each other and begin playing, the front yard was filled with sounds of laughter, the sounds that make your heart full of happy, the sounds that should fill yards.
It was indeed a happy day.
Meeting did not go well this morning, as we arrived to find a full house and no empty seats in the main hall. Mr N still does not do well in the back room, so daddy spent the first half of the meeting in the car with him, then we traded places. Sometimes we tend to forget that Mr N still has limitations since we see how tremendously he has progressed in so many areas. Noises, primarily echoing, still are overwhelming to him and must be avoided if at all possible. Large crowds, especially indoors, are still a source of noises, smells, and sights that send him into sensory overload.
I can't help but be incredibly proud of how far my little man has come, he's excited to be starting school in a couple of weeks, he has a best friend (more about that in a minute), he's self sufficient and independent, at times more so than his sister. Mr N has taken a liking to toast, which he makes and gets for himself without any help; he's getting to where he can put his shoes on all by himself, he's wiping his own butt with prompting, washes his hands, gets dressed and undressed (still needs help with buttons), can buckle and unbuckle the chest clip on his carseat, and I could go on about all of his accomplishments.
So back to his best friend, I had an epic emotional breakdown a few weeks ago (see previous post) after a rough day. Mr N gets along great with most other children, playing and sharing without any prompting, but there are the seldom few who bully him and are just downright mean, which breaks my heart into a million pieces. Not because Mr N gets upset or even realizes it, he freely forgives even the worst injuries, but because bullies exist and they somehow single Mr N out as different then pick on him. I was watching my friend's kids a few days after the meltdown and they were all happily playing throughout the house when I hear the 5 year old say "Mr N is my best friend". I could have kissed that dear child! He doesn't see a child with Autism, he doesn't see a child who has speech delays, he doesn't see anything but his best friend, his friend who likes to play with the same toys and the same games as him, he sees his friend. Not surprisingly, his mom is a dear, sweet friend of mine who has taken the time to teach her children to be kind to others, to treat others as they want to be treated. They didn't come by their manners and good behavior by happenstance, they were taught by their parents; and for this I am forever grateful.
Our friends came over this afternoon for a little play time, when they arrived I was inside doing a quick sweeping in the kitchen and living room (yeah I'm one of those who only cleans 5 minutes before company arrives, sorry friend) as the children piled out of the car and friends ran to greet each other and begin playing, the front yard was filled with sounds of laughter, the sounds that make your heart full of happy, the sounds that should fill yards.
It was indeed a happy day.
Monday, August 18, 2014
Traveling
At the end of the school year we pulled out the calendar sorted out all of our obligations for the summer and blocked off a week in August for a family vacation. This would be our first family vacation of our choosing since 2007, we were super excited to be able to spend a week doing what we wanted to do where we wanted to do it. We tossed around many ideas and finally settled on camping for a week in the Big Horn mountains, hiking, fishing, swimming, shooting, and relaxing out of cell range. As the summer wore on, our excitement increased as we came to realize how nice a relaxing week would be right before getting back to school for the fall.
We set up camp a day early to ensure we got the site we wanted, our plan was to camp the 7-17th of August with Daddy coming back down the 8th to his final day of work before our highly anticipated vacation started. Thursday, August 7, I made a trip to Sheridan for food and other necessities for our vacation, on my return home my mom called to let me know her mother-in-law passed away. After much discussion we decided that being there for my mom took precedence over our planned vacation. We camped in our vacation location on Thursday night since our camp was already set up, then Daddy drove home to work Friday while I unpacked camp and headed down the mountain.
Friday night we drove six hours down to my brother's house, then joined him on the trek across Kansas the following morning. We stopped frequently for gas, food, potty breaks, etc. We arrived in Kansas Saturday afternoon with all of our camping gear in tow and prepared to set up camp. An hour later we had the Jeep and trailer unpacked, tent set up and everything situated for the evening, albeit drenched in sweat from head to toe and sporting a dozen bug bites each.
We spent the week sweating and reminiscing our previous lives in Kansas, but tried to make the most of the trip despite the circumstances. We visited my grandma; we got the kids a pool for the campsite; we went to the lake to swim, play in the sand and fish; fished in the creek; did some shooting; went to the fair and let the kids ride the carnival rides; ate at some of our favorite places; saw some old friends; went to a parade and demolition derby. The smiles on the kids faces on the carnival rides was priceless Mr N rode the Ferris wheel with his older cousin with the biggest smile on his face, the squeals of excitement at the demolition derby are memories that last a lifetime.
We chose not to attend the viewing on Friday evening, but Saturday was full with the funeral, graveside services and family dinner. Mr N did surprisingly well with all three events in one day and even ate three rolls at the dinner.
However, Mr N's eating was poor, at best, all week; barely eating a thing many days but chugging lots of water all week long. I'm not sure if it was the traveling, stress or humidity that effected his eating so much but I'm inclined to think it was a combination of everything. The heat wasn't as bad as the humidity, we woke up wet and went to bed wet, dried off with wet towels, and ditched our wet tent after two and a half nights. We spent the rest of the time bunking with my brother's family in their camper, it was a wonderful reprieve.
We began our trip home Sunday morning with two children begging to eat every couple of hours, they had found their appetite once again. By the time we got to Denver we had fed them five meals, we stopped for two more meals in the last six hours of our trip and they both had 3-5 snacks, too. It was unbelievable the amount of food they ate on the return trip, today they showed no signs of slowing down the consumption of massive amounts of food.
Cancelling our vacation had it's effects on our emotions, but we are determined to get something scheduled in the near future.
We set up camp a day early to ensure we got the site we wanted, our plan was to camp the 7-17th of August with Daddy coming back down the 8th to his final day of work before our highly anticipated vacation started. Thursday, August 7, I made a trip to Sheridan for food and other necessities for our vacation, on my return home my mom called to let me know her mother-in-law passed away. After much discussion we decided that being there for my mom took precedence over our planned vacation. We camped in our vacation location on Thursday night since our camp was already set up, then Daddy drove home to work Friday while I unpacked camp and headed down the mountain.
Friday night we drove six hours down to my brother's house, then joined him on the trek across Kansas the following morning. We stopped frequently for gas, food, potty breaks, etc. We arrived in Kansas Saturday afternoon with all of our camping gear in tow and prepared to set up camp. An hour later we had the Jeep and trailer unpacked, tent set up and everything situated for the evening, albeit drenched in sweat from head to toe and sporting a dozen bug bites each.
We spent the week sweating and reminiscing our previous lives in Kansas, but tried to make the most of the trip despite the circumstances. We visited my grandma; we got the kids a pool for the campsite; we went to the lake to swim, play in the sand and fish; fished in the creek; did some shooting; went to the fair and let the kids ride the carnival rides; ate at some of our favorite places; saw some old friends; went to a parade and demolition derby. The smiles on the kids faces on the carnival rides was priceless Mr N rode the Ferris wheel with his older cousin with the biggest smile on his face, the squeals of excitement at the demolition derby are memories that last a lifetime.
We chose not to attend the viewing on Friday evening, but Saturday was full with the funeral, graveside services and family dinner. Mr N did surprisingly well with all three events in one day and even ate three rolls at the dinner.
However, Mr N's eating was poor, at best, all week; barely eating a thing many days but chugging lots of water all week long. I'm not sure if it was the traveling, stress or humidity that effected his eating so much but I'm inclined to think it was a combination of everything. The heat wasn't as bad as the humidity, we woke up wet and went to bed wet, dried off with wet towels, and ditched our wet tent after two and a half nights. We spent the rest of the time bunking with my brother's family in their camper, it was a wonderful reprieve.
We began our trip home Sunday morning with two children begging to eat every couple of hours, they had found their appetite once again. By the time we got to Denver we had fed them five meals, we stopped for two more meals in the last six hours of our trip and they both had 3-5 snacks, too. It was unbelievable the amount of food they ate on the return trip, today they showed no signs of slowing down the consumption of massive amounts of food.
Cancelling our vacation had it's effects on our emotions, but we are determined to get something scheduled in the near future.
Monday, August 4, 2014
Patience and frustrations
Frustrations stem from seeing Mr N bullied by other children, it absolutely kills me. I don't understand what prompts a child to pick on and single out another child to bully, but it is at the top of my list of things that piss me off. Sadly, Mr N doesn't do anything about it unless he is seriously injured by the bully, typically Mr N just keeps being his sweet self, trying to play with the bully. It takes an injury resulting in blood or bruising before he gets upset or frustrated by a bully, only then does he make it known to me. Obviously, knowing this is an issue, we keep a very watchful eye when he's playing with other children to help redirect him to play with other children and to tell the bully "no, stop that".
The pain and sadness that I feel, as a result of seeing other children bully my little boy, are beyond explanation. My heart aches for my baby, I weep for him. Mr N is sweet to his very core, he forgives eagerly and freely, he asks to play with children even if they were mean to him only minutes prior. I can't fathom as a parent watching my child bully another child without intervening. We don't allow E to pick on or bully her little brother, we don't allow either child to bully other children, it's simply not acceptable. Am I the only parent that cries when her child cries? Am I the only parent who feels sad and guilty when I see my child be rude to others? Having to limit my child's playmates due to their behavior is frustrating, especially when he asks to play with them. But I simply cannot allow him to be treated in such a cruel manner.
I'm sad, I'm angry, I'm hurt, I'm frustrated. I hate seeing my baby hurting. Thankfully, not all children are bullies and I'd be remiss if I neglected to mention that Mr N has some amazing friends who play with him kindly, gently, and fairly; lovely children who ask and want to play with Mr N, eager to share and include him in their games. It's good friends like these who keep me from losing my mind and losing all hope.
Getting all of that off of my chest feels better.....now onto patience.
My patience has grown tremendously over the last few years, I've come to realize that while some behaviors that Mr N displays are irritating and frustrating, many times he has no control over what overwhelms him and when he gets overstimulated. I am much more patient and more inclined to give him a hug, remove him from a situation and just help him relax. If he's had a rough day or been in a challenging situation, it's becoming easier to just chill and respond to his needs with patience, love and understanding rather than getting upset or short with him.
Little miss is eager to use the computer so off I go to cuddle my amazing little boy with a heart so full of love.
The pain and sadness that I feel, as a result of seeing other children bully my little boy, are beyond explanation. My heart aches for my baby, I weep for him. Mr N is sweet to his very core, he forgives eagerly and freely, he asks to play with children even if they were mean to him only minutes prior. I can't fathom as a parent watching my child bully another child without intervening. We don't allow E to pick on or bully her little brother, we don't allow either child to bully other children, it's simply not acceptable. Am I the only parent that cries when her child cries? Am I the only parent who feels sad and guilty when I see my child be rude to others? Having to limit my child's playmates due to their behavior is frustrating, especially when he asks to play with them. But I simply cannot allow him to be treated in such a cruel manner.
I'm sad, I'm angry, I'm hurt, I'm frustrated. I hate seeing my baby hurting. Thankfully, not all children are bullies and I'd be remiss if I neglected to mention that Mr N has some amazing friends who play with him kindly, gently, and fairly; lovely children who ask and want to play with Mr N, eager to share and include him in their games. It's good friends like these who keep me from losing my mind and losing all hope.
Getting all of that off of my chest feels better.....now onto patience.
My patience has grown tremendously over the last few years, I've come to realize that while some behaviors that Mr N displays are irritating and frustrating, many times he has no control over what overwhelms him and when he gets overstimulated. I am much more patient and more inclined to give him a hug, remove him from a situation and just help him relax. If he's had a rough day or been in a challenging situation, it's becoming easier to just chill and respond to his needs with patience, love and understanding rather than getting upset or short with him.
Little miss is eager to use the computer so off I go to cuddle my amazing little boy with a heart so full of love.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)