Kindergarten

It's been a good, long while since my last update.

Mr N loves Kindergarten and is progressing more quickly than we could have ever hoped for, my son who was once lost has not only been found but is doing so well my heart soars. He started off Kindergarten with a full time one on one aide who was by his side all day to assist him, he also was pulled out for forty-five minutes a day for help with writing, speech therapy, and occupational therapy.

By the end of the first trimester of school, they reduced his time in the special ed room to 15 minutes a day for speech therapy only and he no longer has an aide. There is an aide in his class a good bit of the day, but Mr N is not his/her primary focus, it is another child.

Watching my son grow and learn so much and so quickly over the last five months has been incredible. He started off the year unable to write his own name, unable to identify his letters and barely able to count to ten. Fast forward to now, he recognizes every letter and knows their sounds; as well as read many sight words. He can count to 100 (and well beyond) with ease and does quite well with addition and subtraction; he writes his name with only mild complaints about it's length. Mr N is quickly closing the gap between his peers and himself. I'm so excited to see what the future holds for him. Tomorrow we do his annual IEP update, so we should have an even better idea of where he stands.

While Mr N brings us so much joy and happiness (along with his amazingly talented sissy), the unkind comments from others are heart wrenching. I thought that four years into this journey I'd be better equipped to handle rude remarks from others, or even the unintentional insults. It still takes tremendous restraint to bite my tongue and walk away, I'd be lying if I said I was successful every time.

I can't imagine my life without my son, the happiness and joy that he brings are endless. I am a better person because of him. My compassion and kindness that were hard to come by, are now abundant. I am more empathetic towards everyone, knowing that everyone is struggling with something. Visible or not, we all have challenges that we face and being kind to everyone we meet costs nothing.

I would not trade my son for anything in the world. I'd rather have a son with Autism than no son at all, shocking as that may seem to some. I wish for his sake that he was not riddled with a disorder that is so difficult to understand, the challenges he faces, the hurdles he has to overcome. The extraordinary effort he has to put in for ordinary tasks is still painful to watch, but the look of satisfaction on his face when he accomplishes a goal is well worth it. He's amazing.

Mr N is not the only one to bring me so much joy and happiness, my sweet E is an absolute joy. Her sweet, caring personality is so endearing. She never hesitates to help out her brother, whether it be helping him read or teaching him a new game, she's always by his side.

When Mr N started Kindergarten I returned to work full-time much to the dismay of many. While it had always been my intention to return to work once both of my littles were in school full time, I never expected to hear so many negative comments regarding my decision. My heart goes out to all mommy's (and daddy's) who deal with such unkindness upon returning to work to support their family financially. Every family is different, every family's needs are different; different doesn't mean wrong. Instead of making judgmental comments towards others, especially those we call our friends; how about offering a little support. How about considering the thought that maybe the decision they made for their family maybe was difficult for them? Maybe, just maybe, that mom that just returned to work misses her kiddos and already is experiencing mommy guilt without any help from anyone else.

My life is filled with so much love for my children and amazing husband; who has been so incredibly supportive and helpful throughout the transition of me returning to work, I don't know what I would do without this incredible man. I'm so grateful to have such an awesome partner, friend, husband and father to my beautiful babies.