Stupidity

While autism is on the rise with 1 in 88 children being diagnosed, stupidity is far more common. We have celebrities making insulting comments about autism. We have talk show hosts blaming autism for horrendous acts of violence, with absolutely no data to back up their claims.

This post is mostly a rant, so feel free to skip it.

It's not enough that parents of autistic children have to deal with their child's delays, the behaviors, coordinating therapies, etc now they must dispel ignorant rumors, they have to deal with rude, ignorant comments in the grocery store, at the park, or any public place they might encounter stupidity. I'm not certain what possesses people to interfere in someone else's life. Do you really need to walk up to the lady at the deli whose child is having a meltdown and ask her if she wished she could return her child to the aisle she got him from? Really? Do you really need to question a parent who is letting their child eat a bag of chips at 9am? Do you really think it is helpful when you tell a parent that their child just needs a better discipline method? Do you really think it's beneficial to tell a child to behave and apologize to their mother? These are not all my personal experiences, but they have happened to other mothers.

For one minute do these strangers; these people who interrupt our life to interject their ideas, thoughts, and philosophies into our lives; think that we didn't wish that our children could handle a trip to the grocery store without a meltdown? Do they not consider we would love for our children to eat normal, healthy foods at regular intervals so that we didn't have to consume ourselves with worry over their health? Do they think we wouldn't prefer a time out, or counting to 3 to be an effective discipline measure? Why wouldn't we want our children to behave?

I just do not understand the logic these people are using when they interfere. It's like they think we had just not thought to tell our children to not have a meltdown, we hadn't considered telling them to behave.

Every parent of an autistic child knows exactly what I'm talking about, they have been on the receiving end of unsolicited advice time and time again. Some cringe and ignore it, some make replies in hopes of saving other parents from the same onslaught, some try to take the time to explain that the child has autism in hopes of educating the masses. For me, it depends on who the advice giver is, if it's someone I know and will need to interact with on a regular basis, I will educate them and explain the situation. If it's a random stranger in a store, I typically just walk away without saying a word. I would love to think of a sarcastic well worded reply, but if my child is drawing the attention of strangers, then I'm already to the point of exhaustion and in evacuation mode.

Another frustration that parents face is other parents asking if our child did this or that and if we think their child has autism. For one, we aren't doctors, we aren't professionals, if you think your child is delayed in any way you should most definitely talk to your pediatrician about it, early intervention is vital (I can not emphasize this enough). Asking when your child is 10 weeks old, is a bit premature, saying that autism is your worst fear is a bit rude, that your life's dreams will be ruined. I get that life with an autistic child is severely different that that of neurotypical children, but autism is your worst fear? I can think of worse things than having a child with autism....oh let me see having a child with terminal cancer, having a child kidnapped, tay sachs, anencephaly, the list goes on. This is not to say that having a child with autism is a walk in the park, it's not; hopefully I've conveyed the struggles accurately.

Sorry for the long winded vent, it's hot and reading the news today made me cranky.