Starting the week

I dread Mondays. I miss my husband. I miss the hiking, off roading, exploring, and spending time together as a family. Maybe if my husband was a dill hole I wouldn't miss him as much on Mondays. Every Monday E says "where is Daddy?" then dramatically says "I will never see him again". She can be a bit of a drama queen, I readily assure her that Daddy will come home from work tonight, just like always. Inwardly though, I worry about his long commute, worry that his risks of being in an accident increase with all of the driving. But I must push aside the worry, it doesn't benefit anyone.

I push on with my day, start some laundry, clean up the kitchen, pick up from the weekend, dust & de-cobweb the house, scrub sinks, toilets & tubs, make beds & vaccum. This morning also consisted of rearranging the play room to fit the kids new desks. E is super excited to use hers, she did some school work yesterday while I was packing for our day trip.

Mr N accompanies me up and down the stairs many times during the morning, as I get the kids milk, breakfast, take down laundry, get more coffee, try to sit and work on my blog, try to upload pics from the weekend, etc. I constantly work with Mr N on his words, as we climb the stairs we say "up, up, up, up" as we take each step. Sometimes my hard work pays off and Mr N chimes in and says it. This morning he said "up" several times, up is one of his clearest, well spoken words, it gives me hope. I'm so proud of this little man, with which I've been blessed.

Now I must get off the computer and make some more progress on the house. Yet another reason I dread Mondays, cleaning up after the weekend.

I think today I might get brave and post a link to my blog on Facebook, so those that are interested can read about our trip yesterday. Those that are interested in Mr N can follow along my blogging journey of his progress. I'll be honest, it makes me nervous, it scares me, what will my friends think? Will they think I'm weak as a mother? Will they question my ability to parent a special needs child? Am I the only one who worries most about how I'm doing as a mother more than all else? You can judge me all day long about how I look, how my house looks, what you think of me as a person; but my parenting? That's painful because it directly effects how my children turn out.

I'm off to do some more cleaning and pondering the idea of posting a link on Facebook. *sigh*